Don’t annoy your neighbors

Hmm … I’m one to talk. The other day I was watching Golden Jubilee concert on TV and, when Land of Hope and Glory was played, I turned the volume right up just to annoy my neighbors But I’m talking about your business neighbors here.

In our area we have a fabulous hotel with a wonderful restaurant and a brilliant chef. Earlier this year, they decided to feature a special menu every month – a different cuisine each time.

The first was Spain. The second was American BBQ. So far so good – there isn’t a Spanish restaurant on the street or an American BBQ place either.

For June, I fully expected that they would be going a British month. The nearest British place is miles away. There’s nowhere locally you can get Beef Wellington or a cream tea. After all (as referenced above) the Queen is celebrating sixty years on the throne this month and British cuisine has so much rich variety – the chef would have loved it. But no, they chose the cuisine of Greece. (The Queen’s husband was born in Greece so I suppose there is the tiniest connection …. no, not really).

But you see, the problem is that about five minutes away from the hotel is a Greek restaurant. They are serving similar dishes, of course. But what’s more, they are selling a Greek wine and undercutting the local Greek  restaurant. (The Greek restaurant is our client so we are very familiar with their wine list and menu). The hotel has a large marketing budget. The Greek restaurant is independent owned by a local Greek and his nephew – a family concern. Do you think that’s fair? Maybe the hotel just didn’t think about it?

I wonder what the hotel’s cuisine will be next month? Logically, with Bastille Day, it should be French. Although I would have saved the American BBQ for July. But there are three French restaurants just a stroll away so I hope that’s not selected. July is, of course, named after Julius Caesar – how about Ancient Roman food? (Not Italian – we have a lot of Italian restaurants). Apicus, a Roman chef, wrote a cookbook that is available today.

August I think should be Indian food. Indian food is perfect in the warmer months as the spice cools you down. (Seems illogical but it’s true). Every British person for miles around would flock to the hotel. For September  I’d suggest South African. There once was a late-lamented South African restaurant in the area and the food was fabulous. October would be ideal for German food due to Oktoberfest. November? That’s when Lebanon has its independence day and Lebanese food is fabulous. December has to be Scandinavian, of course. In January, Scots everywhere celebrate Burns Night and February sees Mardi Gras, crying out for Louisiana recipes.  In March everyone is Irish on St Patrick’s Day.

What a selection of great cuisines. And there isn’t one of these that would  upset the neighbors.